Tuesday, March 13, 2012

My Love Affair With Food Is Over..at least for now.

Yep.  The title says it all. 

 I am an emotional eater...or at least I was.  I am a "recovering food addict."  That label fits better. 

I would be soothed by putting food in my mouth.  I have a LONG history of this behavior.

I remember as a kid getting a bag of Skittles to mix in Vanilla ice cream and the binge would begin.   Or the time my sister and I ate an entire large bag of Doritos while looking for the "cheesiest chip." 

Stressed?  Eat something.

Bored?  Eat something.

Sad & depressed?  Eat something.

Over the last 16 months I have tried to break this cycle.  I have been quite sucessful....surprising myself daily.

Since getting the band 8 months ago, I haven't been able to binge.  Even if I wanted to....my band wouldn't really let me be a total glutton.

Now that I am in the "green zone,"  I notice that eating isn't nearly as fun, enjoyable, and relaxing as it used to be.  It's just more work to eat and I can't eat the large quantities that used to make me feel temporarily good....of course followed by self-loathing and guilt.

The point is that my band does not make the food choices for me, but it does keep what ever I have chosen in check....I physically CAN NOT binge.  (Happily, I haven't binged on ice cream or sliders...because we all know we can get those down easy enough!)  I have wanted to binge a few times though.

Hopefully, I will continue to deal with my emotions in healthy ways and NEVER go back to food as my crutch. 

Food is my addiction and something I have to deal with every day...some days are easier than others though.


7 comments:

  1. Congrats on getting to the right mindset for this journey :o) that is most of this journey!

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  2. This is my exact mindset. Glad to hear someone else has the same thought process! We're in recovery. :)

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  3. I have never been a binge-eater per se, grazing was more my downfall. But I'm not sure why having the sleeve has given me power over grazing (because let's face it I can always graze and it won't faze my sleeve!) It's so nice having some limits and controls. Congrats on being 8 months!!!

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  4. I would like to just copy and paste this to my blog!!!

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  5. Just in case I haven't mentioned it in awhile.....you rock!!

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  6. That is so awesome. It gives me hope...I was just banded on Jan 24th, and my first fill was 2 weeks ago. I was very excited to get my first fill. I can feel some differance, and I noticed I really need to take smaller bites. I can't wait till I get to my green zone and have the same experiance as you. Thanks for posting how you feel.

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  7. Did you write this blog about me? I feel exactly the same...

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