Tuesday, July 24, 2012

Do you ever ......?

Do you ever wonder if your clothes won't fit even though they fit yesterday?

I do.  I sometimes worry, stress ....freak my self out...that overnight I gained back all 60+ pounds.

Do you ever find yourself watching a "diet" infomercial or reading an ad for some "magic diet pill" and seriously considering it?

I do.  I forget that I am close to my goal weight.  I still have those moments when I feel desperate to take charge of my weight.  Then I realize, I don't need that infomerical/ pill....I am working my band.

Do you ever feel like you look fit only to see yourself in a different mirror and think....is that what I really look like?

I do.  Sometimes the mirror shows a different body than I feel like I have.  Which image is "real?"

Do you ever force yourself to go to bed because that is the only way to make sure you don't eat anything else for the day?

I do.  I am going to bed right now for that exact reason.

I know I have come a long way in the last 20 months dealing with the mental component of food addiction......the negative self talk, the compulsiveness, the thoughts about food.........but I still have so far to go.  One day at a time.


  1. One day at a time... that is what I'm telling myself today. :)

  2. SO much of this battle is mental. I never really appreciated that until I was banded. We will win though. You're doing incredibly!

  3. I do for them all. Some days I look at myself and honestly think I look the same and want to just cry. And if I slip up once I figure I might as well just give up because all the weight is going to be back when I weigh myself in the morning.
    I wish this surgery could fix our heads too.

  4. I totally do the going to bed thing. It works.

  5. I do the bed thing too. I SHOULD have last night. But I didn't. And I see something different in the mirror... I actually think I look BETTER than I do. Go figure. It is pictures that freak me out. I usually feel cute when I am checking myself out in the mirror.

  6. OMG, I am JUST AS paranoid as you are!!! ha ha ha ha, no seriously, I AM!!!! For your question #2 ... the other day I called my provider to see if I could get on Lasik so I could shed some pee faster and get fluid out of me... she denied it saying it was all do to the extreme heat we are having on the prairie!!! So then I just kept drinking water all damn day and night long!!! And I do the bed thing too. I did that two weeks prior to surgery and I've been doing it now 4 wks.

  7. I always look in the mirror and say who the hell is that fat chick?

    and I got to bed at 8;30 every day during the week #1 I get early and do my workouts at 5:15 am...but moreso I am hungry so I sleep!

  8. Ugh, I feel ya. I go to bed early almost every night for that reason. In fact, last night my beau and I went to In-N-Out for dinner for him and I got a lunch for today... killed me not to eat it in the car on the way home!

    Also, I wonder how long we're not gonna recognize our bodies? I have the same feelings when I'm standing in front of a mirror. Sometimes I think I'm bigger than I actually am, sometimes smaller. Oy.